Ultimate Spider-Man Series Premiere (2012) TV series

Rating:  4 out of 5 members of the Frightful Four beaten inexplicably

Plot Synopsis:  Spider-Man introduces himself and show’s what he can do while establishing his world, the rules of that world and the inhabitants of that world.

The Good:

-J.K. Simmons as the voice of J.J. Jameson

-Intro of the Trapster, I can totally get behind those introductions of the villains if that’s how they’re going to do it.

-Trapster looks pretty bad ass

-The little anime cutaways to emphasis intro’s and gags.

-Sam Jackson style Nick Fury.

-We cut to Iron Man making an ass out of himself

-The origin story is handled beautifully.  Exactly how I like to see it.  We start with Spider-Man already at this for a year and we cover the back story with some great cutaways.

-Daily Bugle is now a multi-media empire rather than just a newspaper guy.

-Stan Lee as the janitor.

-As lame as it is that Spidey takes out the Frightful Four the fight itself is pretty awesome.

-The sound effect illustration cutaways when he hits particularly hard.

-Spidey puts Flash Thompson in a locker.

-Spider-Man in a sombrero

-Aunt May is now a super active GILF.

-Peter is portrayed with the right mix of sarcastic witty quips and personal guilt.

-I love Agent Coulson and I’m glad to see him play a role in this.

The Bad:

-MJ is a journalism student and Pete’s best friend.  That is not MJ, MJ is the love of Peter’s life and a model.  She represents the nerd dream, the hot girl that loves you for who you are.  Why did it have to be MJ?  You have Gwen Stacy to work with.  Make Gwen the journalism best friend and MJ the hot cheerleader girlfriend of Flash Thompson.

-Hey Spider-Man I’m just going to say your secret identity out loud so anyone paying attention can figure out who you are and take advantage of that.

-Harry is about as stiff as James Franco

-The Frightful Four is way out of young Spider-Man’s league.  Wizard?  Klaw?  Thundra?  As individuals they stand alone against The Fantastic Four, The Avengers and The Hulk.  One measly wall crawler, as awesome as Spidey is, could not take them.

-Aunt May is a super active GILF

-What’s all this bullshit about Hulk being better than Thing.  The ever loving blue eyed Thing can, if not beat, then hold his own, against the Jade Giant.

-Iron Fist and Power Man are kids.  I don’t really care that Nova is a kid or White Tiger.  My Heroes for Hire deserve better.

-All the thwip puns.

-Did I just see a Ferris Bueller’s Day Off reference?

The Ugly:

-I hate the “the just thwip it” catch phrase they try to push on us.

-The Zach Morris “time out” cutaways.  They handle some exposition pretty well but when the main character 

looks at the camera and freezes time I just think of Saved by Bell.

-Aunt May is a super active GILF

-I’m not saying you’re Spider-Man, I’m just practicing what I’m going to say to Spider-Man.

-Why do they have to shoe horn in Curt Conners into everything Spider-Man and why is he a two armed Q?

Final Thoughts:  A really great first showing.  The animation is anime influenced and really good with no obvious rough spots.  They establish a good universe for Ultimate Spider-Man with the inclusion of S.H.I.E.L.D., Agent Coulson as Principal of Peter’s school, the super team and the shady conspiracy Norman Osborn is involved in.  There are problems with the world, Aunt May, MJ, Harry, Iron Fist and Power Man and the Zach Morris time outs.  But despite its faults it holds a lot of promise for the series.